If You Could Have One Thing
by darkdemongc53
Summary: Harry thinks he has lost the one thing that matters to him, until he returns. Then things start to get comlicated. Will Harry and Sirius ever be able to live in peace without any complications? MPREG HPSB
1. 1st Chapter

Author: Me Brittany

Title: If You Could Have One Thing

Rating: R obviously

Disclaimer: I own the world! Muwhahahahaha! No I don't own anything but the ideas.

Spoilers: OotP 

This is my first ever fanfiction, ever. So please be nice but try and help me a bit with the reviews. Also I might not be that fast with updating since I'm also writing a SS/HP and a SS/OC right now but I will try my hardest. Thank You!

I don't think I have ever been so depressed or sad in my life. Just a few days ago I lost the only person I could ever say was family. The scene just kept replaying over and over again in my head. The shocked look on his beautiful face. The way he feel behind that horrid curtain. 

"Harry are you alright?" My best friend Ron asked. We were packing our clothes getting ready to leave Hogwarts for the summer. I just nodded. We both knew I was miserable. I was although going to stay at his house just until I was stable again. What know one knew though was that I would never be stable again, not without him. 

"Come on mate, lets go." Ron said and placed his hand on my shoulder. I once again just nodded. We dragged our trunks down into the common room. Hermione was sitting in one of the chairs by the fireplace. I knew her and Ron were sad too, but me and Sirius had something special. He was someone I could go to, talk to. Hermione stood up and walked over to me. She dropped into my arms and for the first time since I had last seen Sirius I cried, we cried. 

"Harry I can't believe he's gone." She sobbed. I looked up at Ron and he was silently crying. I handed Hermione over to him, knowing it would be better if they had each other. I would have normally gone to Sirius for comfort and that thought brought more tears. 

"We should probably get going." Ron said and I nodded again. I hadn't talked to anyone since I had gotten back to the school. ' 

All the way home on the train I was silent, as usual. Hermione would let a few tears slip and Ron stared off into space, holding her hand. I wish I had someone to hold my hand and comfort me but that someone was dead, and he wasn't coming back. I need to face the sad truth. 

After awhile the train came to a halt. I got out and followed Ron out. We walked through the barrier and Ron's parents were standing there. Mrs. Weasley suddenly burst into tears and ran towards me. 

"Harry...Oh Harry...you poor poor thing. Oh and I was always so mean to him." She sobbed all over me. Finally Mr. Weasley came to my rescue. 

"Dear let the poor boy breath." He smiled at me sadly. I saw no reason for him to be smiling. What was there to smile about? Ron and Hermione were saying good-bye, kissing and whispering things to each other. I turned around jealous already. He finally decided that it was time to go. He blew a kiss to Hermione and we were off. When we got there everyone was quiet. Ginny walked up to her room as did me and Ron to his. 

"Harry, are you sure your alright? You didn't even say goodbye to Hermione, and you aren't talking to anyone. If there's anyone you can talk to it's me." But he was so wrong. I finally gathered up the courage to say my first words since those days of Sirius's fate. 

"No, I can't talk to you Ron. The one person I could talk to his dead, gone. Isn't coming back." I said my voice cracked from the days of not using it. He looked at me bewildered. 

"I'll just leave you then." He said a little offended. 

"No, I'm sorry Ron. You understand right. I just...I miss him so much." I said and tears streamed down my face. He walked over to me. 

"I know Harry, I know. We all do. Sirius was... he didn't deserve that. I know that you really did love him, but Harry...he's gone. I wish I didn't have to say that but he's gone." Ron said slowly. I didn't want to believe him but I knew it was true. I wanted to believe that any minute he would burst through the Weasley's door smiling as if nothing happened, and he would walk over to me and give me a hug and say that nothing was going to happen and that everything was going to be alright. 

"Ron, I just I miss him so much. I don't know if I'll be able to live without him." I said through my tears. "I never even told him how much I love him." I said and completely broke down. Ron then all of a sudden got up and walked out. 

"I'm going to leave you be Harry." He said sadly and shut the door. I sat there and stared at the door for a while then decided to try and sleep, even thought I knew that would be impossible. I hadn't sleep since...since that day. I lay down fully clothed and shut my eyes. Memories came flooding back. 

I remembered when I first met Sirius. Skinny, underfed, all around awful looking. I remember how I almost killed the closest person to me because of what other people said. I was so excited when he asked me to leave the Dursley's to come and live with him, until Peter broke loose again, how I had to save his weak form from the dreaded dementors. I remember all the advice he gave me for the Triwizard tournament. I remember seeing him again at the Order of the Phoenix headquarters, looking so much better and healthier, happier. And the dream I had of Voldemort threatening to kill him, but Sirius wouldn't because of me. And the curse his cousin put on him as he fell to his death. He was always there for me. 

"Sirius I just wish you were here." I couldn't stay here where all of these people could never amount to the love of Sirius. I slowly grabbed a small bag and shoved a few articles of clothing into it. I put some jeans a black t-shirt and a long billowing black cloak. I put my wand into my pocket, put the bag on my shoulders and walked out of the door. The Weasley's were all sitting with there back facing the door so it made my leaving much easier. I opened the door and shut it with a small click. I decided to go to the Order of the Phoenix headquarters, or in other words Sirius's home. After some time I made it. I walked up and the house appeared. I drug my feet up to the front door and slowly opened it. Remus Lupin was sitting on one of the sofas. 

"Harry! What are you doing here?!" He shouted and jumped up from the couch and ran over to me. His eyes were red and puffy, he did just lose his best friend, but that was all they were, me and Sirius were much more. 

"I..I couldn't stay in a house were there was so much love." I whispered. He nodded and suddenly grabbed me. 

"I know Harry. He was important to all of us." 

"He didn't deserve to go, he wasn't done here, he left me!" I shouted and feel onto the floor."He left me!" Remus wrapped his arms around me and tried anyway he could to comfort me. 

"It wasn't his plan, I'm sure he didn't want to leave you here." 

"I know. I just need to go for a little bit." He smiled weakly at me and nodded. I slowly walked up the stairs and turned to go into the guest through and kept walking. I walked into Sirius's old bedroom. I climbed into the bed and inhaled the scent of the pillow. It smelled exactly like him. I pulled my glasses off and slowly drifted off the sleep for the first time since that night. I was woken up by someone shaking me lightly. 

"Harry...Harry please wake up. It's me, I'm back." I knew that voice better then my own. I shot up and looked around, but everything was blurry. I swung my arms around and felt him, his soft skin. 

"Sirius? Oh god Sirius." I pulled him towards me, tightly. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. 

"I'm sorry Harry, I'm just a little late." He gently placed my glasses on after a while. I looked at him and smiled. 

"I..I thought you were dead." He laughed roughly. 

"So did I. I just woke up. I don't know how I'm alive, all I know is that I am. I don't care how I was saved." I looked up into his twinkling dark brown eyes. 

"I'm glad your here Sirius. I finally have someone to go to, to talk to, to lo..." I stopped in the middle of my love word. I blushed a deep red. Sirius didn't know how I felt about him, how I really felt about him. I twisted around. "I'm sorry." I whispered and walked into the bathroom. I sobbed and sobbed. He'd think I was gross. He was my fucking godfather, twice my age. He could be my father and I wanted to be his lover. 

"Harry you better open this fucking door. This is my house and you better listen to me." He growled and pounded on the door. 

"Don't you think I'm gross." I sobbed and hiccupped at the same time. 

"Harry...just come out. It's okay. We can talk this over." 

"But I don't want to talk about it." 

"If you can't talk to me about it who are you going to talk to." That made me shut up. I slowly got off of the toilet seat, I walked over to the door and opened it up. Sirius was leaning up against the door jam. I looked up at him my eyes were glittering with tears. And to my surprise so were his. I leaned up against him and breathed in. 

"I'll understand if you don't want to talk to me anymore." I whispered into his shirt. His hand went to the back of my head and slowly rubbed the back of my head. 

"Harry, please don't talk like that. Just, I need to think about this." I nodded. He walked me over to the bed and sat me down. I got under the covers and laid my head down into the pillow. He pulled my glasses off. 

"I'm glad your not dead, Sirius." He smiled down at me. 

"I know Harry, I know." That was the last thing I heard before drifting off to sleep. 

****

Sirius P.O.V.

I sat there and watched his beautiful form slowly move up and down, from his breathing pattern. He was so small and innocent, but at the same time he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. I leaned down and kissed him on the forehead, gently so he wouldn't wake up. I slowly got up and walked all the way downstairs, Remus was still there. 

"How's he doing." He asked softly. He had explained to me how Harry was when he had first arrived. 

"Much better." I lied. I needed to think about what Harry had said to me. I had loved him since I had first laid eyes on him. He looked just like my best friend, except for those eyes. Those were his gorgeous mother's eyes. A perfect combination. But I was supposed to be a fatherly figure to him, not a lover. 

"That's good." Remus said and broke my trance. I nodded and smiled up at him. 

"I think I'll be going now. I know it's a little soon, but don't worry. I think you and Harry have a lot of catching up to do." He said and winked at me. 

"That we do." I smiled and we embraced. He walked out the door to leave me to deal with these weird emotions. I went into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I didn't know what to do. My heart was bursting with love, but my mind told me it was wrong. But how could it be wrong if he felt the same way? I needed to tell him how I felt about him. I'll take him out then when we get home I'll tell him. It will be perfect. After a while in my trance I heard a small voice from behind me. 

"Sirius." I heard Harry whisper. At his voice I stood up and spun around to see his glowing green eyes, and his ruffled black hair. He smiled childishly up at me. 

"How'd you sleep Harry?" I asked softly and walked up to him. 

"Fine, good as I could. Is Remus still here?" 

"No, you just missed him, but don't worry he'll be back." 

"That's good." He giggled, then turned red. I laughed at him and looked up at me confused. Talk about weird. 

"Harry I was..um wondering if maybe you wanted to instead of eating here tonight if you wanted to go out somewhere tonight. I understand if you don't want to, I mean you've got a lot to deal with at the moment." He looked up at me, his eyes were twinkling with amusement. 

"Yea, I'd like that a lot." 

"That's good." I whispered. We just stood there staring at each other. 

"Well I better go get ready then." He said and turned around and walked upstairs. 

"That went smooth, hey Sirius." I jumped and spun around. Severus Snape was leaning against the now open front door. We had surprisingly became very close friends. I grinned at him. I hadn't seem him since I had...fallen. 

"Severus!" I said and walked up to him. We embraced. 

"Seems as if you have yet again gotten away from deaths hands." 

"Surprisingly." I said and he laughed. 

"So you have a hot date. And when I say hot I mean hot." He smirked at me. I shoved him. 

"Don't you even hit on my god-child..." 

"...and boyfriend." I tried to hide my grin but nothing got past him. 

"He is not my boyfriend. We just haven't seen each other and I thought it would be nice to bring him out." 

"Still doesn't mean he isn't hot." 

"Hey he's mine keep your slimy hands off of him." 

"Hmm Harry Potter and the infamous Sirius Black. Never would have seen it coming." 

"What about Harry Potter." I heard an angelic voice from the stairway. I turned around and my breath got caught in my throat. He had a pair of midnight black pants on and a dark hunter green turtleneck on with a cloak a color to match his pants that went past his feet. I could tell he had attempted to tame his hair but it was still as messy as ever. 

"Erm..you look great." I said breathlessly and he blushed. 

"Hello Harry. You look better since the last time I saw you." Severus said. He had been talking with Harry for a while and after that...night Severus watched over him. 

"Hm so do you Severus." He said and quickly embraced him. 

"So I heard you and Sirius are having a big night tonight." 

"Haha. If that's how you want to put it, sure." He laughed and glanced at me. I smiled at him. 

"Well I guess I better go get ready then." 

****

Severus P.O.V.

I watched as Sirius walked up the stairs. I looked at Harry again. 

"You really love him don't you?" I asked him. Me and Harry had gotten pretty close. 

"You can tell that much?" He asked me. He still acted like he did when I saw him when he was 11. 

"If it's not love I don't know what it is." 

"Yea I do. But when I kind of let it slip he looked a little I don't know scared, confused, angry. I don't want to do anything that will ruin me and his relationship." My heart broke for this small boy. 

"Don't worry. I don't think Sirius could ever ruin what you guys have, even if he tried." Harry tried to laugh, but he wasn't very successful. He was scared, and believe me I could tell if someone was scared. 

"I know, doesn't mean he couldn't try." I frowned at him. 

"Stop worrying Harry. Everything will be fine. Believe me I've known him for years. He never walks away from anything." 

"Thanks Severus." He smiled at me. 

"You guys better have fun tonight. Don't worry I've got a little something for you guys after." I said and winked at him. 

"Well when you two are done chatting I'd like to leave." I saw Sirius coming down. He didn't look half that bad. He had an outfit on just like that only instead of a green shirt it was royal blue. His hair was down and ruffled. 

****

Harry P.O.V.

Sirius looked amazing. He walked up and hugged Severus and whispered something to him. 

"As I said before you two have fun." He smiled and briskly walked out the door. Sirius turned and looked at me straight in the eyes. 

"Hi Harry." He whispered. 

"You look great." I said. He smiled at me. 

"Well thank you. And as I said before, you look stunning." I blushed. 

"Thanks." I murmured. 

"You ready to go?" He asked. 

"Well of course." I answered formally and we both laughed. 

"Let's just walk. It's right down the street from here. But you might want to get a scarf, it's pretty chilly." 

"Okay that sounds good." I grabbed a black scarf, as did Sirius and we were off. 

"You and Severus seemed pretty close." 

"We are." I answered. Our arms were swinging at the same time and our hands brushed against each other. I looked up at Sirius and his eyes were twinkling. I grinned back up at him. I grabbed his hand and we intertwined fingers, and he didn't even pull away. I walked up closer to him, and he didn't walk away. I was hoping that was a good sign. But I wanted to be closer. I pretended to shiver, even though I was perfectly fine. 

"Harry are you okay? Are you sick?" He asked a little frantic. 

"No I'm just a little cold that's all." I answered, I was an awful liar and that was one of my secrets Sirius knew. 

"Mhm." He answered with a little playfulness. He pulled his hand away and replaced over mine shoulder. I snuggled up against him and wrapped my other arms around his waist. 

"This is better." I whispered. 

"That's good." After a while of walking we made it to the little pub we were going to eat at. Nothing fancy. We walked inside and it was dark and smoky. Me and Sirius walked to the very back of the pub into a small booth. 

"I know it's not much, but I don't think it would be a good idea if I was out in the open as much right now." 

"Yea your probably right." I answered. I liked this better anyway. We both ordered water, we didn't want to get carried away. 

"Harry, your 15 right?" 

"Yep, but almost 16." I added just like a 5 year old about to turn 6. We both laughed. From under the table he inched his hand forward and slowly grabbed my hand. He looked up at me as if to ask if it was okay. I smiled at him to say it was fine. We ate in silence, but every so often we glanced at each other and smiled. After a while of comfortable silence we decided to go home. Sirius looked quite nervous about something and kept looking at his watch. 

"Hey you okay?" I asked him. We were walking back home and our fingers were intertwined. 

"Hm? Oh yeah just want to make sure its not past your bedtime." He joked and I pushed him softly. 

"How would you know MY bedtime?" I asked him jokingly. 

"Because I'm your guardian and that means I get to decide your bedtime." 

"Hm is that so?" I asked him in the cutest voice I could muster. 

"Yes it is so." He said and laughed and nudged me slightly. "Harry can I tell you something?" I glanced up at him and he looked terrified about something. 

"Are you sure your okay Sirius?" I asked a little panicked. 

"Yes I'm fine Harry. Do you remember how I said I would have to think about what you said before?" He asked me, staring down at the ground. 

"Of course." I answered and looked at him. He lifted his head up and stared down at me. Before I knew what was happening he was leaning down and I was leaning up until our lips met. I shut my eyes and scooted closer to Sirius. He reached his hand down and cupped my cheek. I wrapped my arms around his next and pressed my lips against his in a bruising kiss. The need for air overcame us and we separated. He looked down at me and his eyes shimmered. I looked back up at him and smiled shyly. 

"Wow." He said breathlessly. I nodded and leaned in again. I couldn't keep my lips off of his. He pulled away and laughed. "I think we better get going." He said and I nodded dumbly. We started walking and I got as close to him as I could and wrapped my arms around his waist. We kept walking and finally made it to the Black's secret house. There was a dim glow coming from the windows. 

"I guess Severus is gone." I muttered to myself. 

"He better be." Sirius growled under his breath. 

"And why is that Mr. Black?" I asked sweetly and batted my eyelashes at him. 

"Because your just so damn cute and I want you for myself." He growled. I 

shivered and Got on my tiptoes to kiss him. Our lips meet in a breathtaking kiss right outside the hidden house. We both broke apart breathing deeply. I smiled up at him and a light pink rose to my cheeks. 

"Maybe we should-"I broke off panting. 

"-go inside." Sirius finished off for me. I smiled at him and let him lead the way. He opened the door for me and my breath caught in my throat.

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Next Chapter: Harry and Sirius get a little closer, but they are not quite there yet. Also Harry meets up with Ron and Hermione and there are some confrontations 

Review!!!!!!!


	2. 2nd Chapter

~CTB, Jen, Patricia, crimsontearsofpain, torri, larissa~

Thanks for reviewing everybody. 

Jlarinda ~ Snape is being friendly for no reason. I just love him so much and I could not resist the urge to add him to this story, as a nice guy. Don't worry I will explain how Sirius returned in the next chapter.

Sorry everybody! I know it has taken me forever to get this chapter out but I've been really sick for a while and I'm also doing state testing all this week. I also have Hidden For You I have to keep updating on, but don't worry I will hopefully get this chapters out a lot fast. I no what is going to happen like the entire rest of the story so the chapters will come faster. Well read and enjoy. Don't forget to REVIEW!

There were beautiful red rose petals all over the floor. There were floating candles all throughout the house. There was sappy romance music playing faintly in the background. 

"This is so romantic." I choked out and laughed. It was just like something out of a perfect fairy tale. I walked farther into the house and spun around. I couldn't believe it. I was living my dreams. I turned to look at Sirius and I smiled at him. He looked back at me and smiled. He finally walked in and shut the door. 

"I no it's kind of corny, but believe me none of it was my idea. It was all Severus's." Sirius said and winked. I smiled and walked up to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck. 

"Are you sure you had absolutely nothing to do with this." I asked dramatically. 

"Absolutely zero." He whispered and lightly pressed his lips against mine. I slightly pulled away. 

"I guess your right. You never were the one for corny romance." I breathed against his lips and kissed him again. He slowly unclasped my outer cloaks and let them drop to the floor. We inched closer to the couch. I unclasped his cloaks as well and they were forgotten on the floor. We finally made it to the couch. Sirius gently laid me down on the rose infested couch. He crawled on top of me, our lips never breaking contact. With one hand he removed my glasses and put them on the coffee table. I ran my hands through his hair as he slide his tongue into my mouth. We fought for dominance for a while until I gave up and he explored every inch of my mouth. He ran his tongue along the roof of my mouth. 

"Oh God Sirius." I moaned into his mouth. I loved the way he felt on top of me, the way his mouth fit mine perfectly, the way he was so gently with me, but despite all of these things I didn't want to do it tonight. I couldn't. Despite the fact that I loved the man laying on top of me I could not have sex with him that night. We had been together what w few hours. I couldn't do this. 

"Sirius." I whispered."Sirius" I lightly pushed my hands against his chest. 

"Harry is everything alright." He asked nervously. I knew he didn't want to mess this up. 

"I can't do this. Not now. I want it to be special. Not that this isn't, this is wonderful. I just want to wait a bit." I flushed a bit. To my surprise Sirius chuckled. 

"That's fine Harry. I'm glad you said something. Let's just leave this for another time." I smiled up at him glad that he understood. He lifted me up gently and carried me up to his room. I quickly took my clothes off until I just had my boxers on. I jumped into the bed and patted the spot next to me. 

"Come on Siri." I whined. He laughed and followed my motions before climbing into the bed behind me. He wrapped his arm around my waist. I snuggled up closer to him. He softly kissed my neck. 

"I love you Harry." Sirius whispered. My eyes widened. Then I smiled and relaxed. Of course he loved me. 

"I love you Sirius." I said and drifted off to sleep. 

When I woke up the sun was shinning very brightly into my unprotected eyes. I groaned and rolled over. The spot next to me was empty. I immediately thought, this was all a dream. Sirius never came back, and we never went out or anything. But then I heard the shower and someone whistling and I settled back into the bed. He was alive. I decided I wasn't going to take a shower today, so I grabbed my wand muttered a quick cleaning spell and hopped out of bed. I hadn't brought that many clothes so I went rummaged through Sirius's. I found a pair of tight dark navy jeans and I tight black shirt. After I had shrunk them down to size they looked perfect, showing off everything that I wanted to be shown off. I remembered my glasses were downstairs so I would get them later. As I was tying my nice black leather shoes Sirius walked out of the bathroom, with just a towel wrapped around his waist. 

"Nice outfit." I said and smiled up at him. He laughed and went over to the dresser. 

"See you found something that fits nicely. He smirked at me. I nodded and walked up behind him. I wrapped my arms around his waist and started kissing his neck. He groaned and leaned against me. I purred lowly, then pulled away. 

"I'm going to the Weasley's. I think they deserve an explanation. Sirius groaned then nodded. 

"Don't stay out to late." He shouted after me. I laughed softly and walked over to the fireplace. I looked around for his floo powder and found it in a small jar on the coffee table, next to my glasses which I grabbed. I grabbed a handful of the floo powder stepped into the fireplace and shouted "The Burrow!" The next thing I knew I was lying on the floor with have of the Weasley family looking down at me, obviously shocked. 

"Er hi everybody." I stammered and got up, dusting myself off. 

"Harry Potter! Where did you disappear off to last night!?" Mrs. Weasley shouted at me. I smiled at her and chuckled softly. 

"I just went out for a while." I glanced around for Ron and saw him standing behind his father. "Ron, me you upstairs." I said and he nodded. I ran up to his room, with Mrs. Weasley just scowling at me. 

"What is it mate?" Ron asked as soon as we got up to his room. I grinned at him and started jumping up and down. 

"Sirius is alive!" I shouted and started shaking him by the shoulders. I couldn't stop grinning. Ron's eyes widened and he started laughing. 

"Your kidding right?" He asked still shocked. 

"Would I be this happy if I were lying?" I questioned and he laughed again. 

"We should tell Hermione." Ron suggested. I quickly nodded. I ran over to Hedwig's cage where she was sleeping. 

"Come on girl. You get to go see Hermione." I cooed at her. I quickly grabbed a piece of parchment, a bottle of ink, and an eagle feather. 

Dear Hermy, 

I've got the best news, but it would be kind of lame and unexciting if I told you in a letter. So meet me and Ron at the Leaky Cauldron tomorrow at 2 pm. 

Love your bestest friend, 

Harry. 

He signed the letter and tied it to Hedwig's leg."Try and get it to her as fast as possible." I said and opened the window for her to fly out. 

"What did you write?" Ron questioned. 

"We are meeting her tomorrow at the Leaky Caldron as 2. But I have to go back to Sirius. There's also something I will tell you and Hermione tomorrow. Well goodbye." With that I was downstairs and flooing back to my beloved. 

I shot out of the fireplace into a certain Mr. Black. I looked down at him from my position on top of him. I smiled at him and touched my lips to his in a long passionate kiss. 

"Nice welcome." I said and jumped off of him. I reached my hand out to him which he took gratefully. When I pulled him up he wrapped me into a hug and kissed the top of my head. 

"Only for he." He whispered against my hair. This was perfect. My dreams were coming true. I had always wanted Sirius. There was only one problem with being with Sirius, I would never really have a family of my own. There would never be small pitter patters of tiny feet running through the house. No big family to celebrate first moments with. Adoption was an option, but it just wasn't the same. At all of these thoughts I started crying. Not crying, bawling. I feel to my knees and sobbed and sobbed. 

"Harry!" Sirius shouted and sat down next to me. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his lap. I leaned back into his soft embrace. There had to be a way. There just had to be a way, or I wouldn't live. After a while I calmed down. 

"I'm sorry." I whispered. Sirius kissed the spot under my ear. It sent a shiver through my body. 

"What happened, love?" He asked. It felt nice to hear him call me his love. 

"I just got a little overwhelmed. That's all." I could feel Sirius nod, although I knew I hadn't convinced him. I slowly got back up to my feet. Again I helped Sirius up to his feet, our hands never leaving each others. 

"How about some lunch?" Sirius suggested. I nodded. I was feeling hungry. I looked to the clock on the wall. It read 12:26. So it was about lunch time. After we had gotten a small but nice meal of sandwiches and fruit we ate in silence. My eyes kept dropping lower and lower. 

"Hey Siri I think I'm going to go take a little nap." I said and yawned. Sirius looked at me with concerned eyes then nodded. 

"While your gone I think I owe a visit to Remus." He said. He gave me a quick kiss and hug and with a small "pop" was gone. I waited a few minutes until I was sure he wasn't coming back. I had to go to the Hogwarts Library and try and fix my child problem. I walked over to the fireplace and flooed to the Hogwarts library. Thankfully it was empty. Not even one teacher was in there. I walked over to the P's. 

"Palm Reading...Prophecies...Penguins, that's odd...Pregnancies." I pulled the book out brought it over to a table and began to read. There was a lot of things about how to get pregnant and how to deliver, then I came to it, Male Pregnancies. So it was possible. My eyes lite up. 

Male pregnancies are rare but possible. To become pregnant in a man man relationship is the same as a male female pregnancy with a few adjustments. First only the youngest of the two companions can carry the child. The younger man must take a potion (ingredients and procedure on page 156). This potion enables the man to grow a female vagina for the delivery and the delivery only. Carrying the child would be the same as a woman carrying the child, although it will not be as obvious. Towards the 8-9 month the carrier must have lots of sleep, for they must have plenty of energy to grow the vagina and deliver the child. There are very few deaths or risks in a male pregnancy. 

I couldn't stop grinning. That was all I had to do. Drink a potion and wait. Then there was Sirius. What was he going to think. I sighed and decided I would think about it later. I flipped to page 156 and read over the potion. It seemed easy enough, even I could make it. I ripped out the male pregnancy part and the potion, hoping know one would notice. I flooed back to Sirius's home and walked upstairs. I put the pages under the bed mattress and decided to go to sleep. I was extremely tired and I had a lot to think about.

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Next Chapter~ Harry meets Ron and Hermione and tells them about him and Sirius and about his discovery in the library. Harry brings up the children idea to Sirius.

REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	3. 3rd Chapter

rhiannan star, miru amai

Oh yea two reviews for this chapter. Well thanks for those of you guys that did review.

I know this chapter is kind of short, but I was trying to get it out as fast as I could. Also in the last chapters I said that Sirius's eyes were brown, and they are blue. Sorry about that. Well read, review, and enjoy.

I woke up and saw two sapphire eyes staring back into my own. I grinned up at them and kissed the persons lips. 

"Good morning." I said and greeted Sirius. He smiled back and kissed me again. 

"Good morning." He said back then rolled off of me. 

"Did you have fun with Remus?" I asked jumping out of bed. 

"A wonderful evening. Did you have fun sleeping?" He asked. I tried to look innocent. 

"Oh yes just a lovely time." I said sarcastically. I walked into the bathroom and stripped my clothes off. I jumped into the shower quickly washed up then got out. I dried myself off with a towel, wrapped it around my waist and walked out. Sirius was still laying on the bed staring at the ceiling. 

"Nice outfit." He grinned at me. I stuck my tongue out and walked over to his dresser. 

"I'm going to borrow some clothes again today. I'm going out with Hermione and Ron. I'm going to tell them about...us." I said cautiously. I didn't know if Sirius wanted anybody knowing about us yet, if there even was an us. 

"Really? You think they will mind?" 

"Hermione will be thrilled, its Ron I'm not so sure about." I said as I slipped a green shirt on that matched my eyes. I pulled on some jeans and sat down on the bed. 

"Well once Hermione agrees she'll talk Ron into being sensible about it." Sirius said and pulled me down next to him. I nuzzled up next to him and breathed in, he smelled so good. He slowly drew circles on my back. I looked up at him and kissed him softly. 

"What time is it?" I mumbled against his lips as I pressed him into the bed and crawled on top of him. 

"One something." He growled playfully and pressed his lips harder against mine. I shot up and looked at him. 

"I slept in that late!?" I yelled and grabbed my cloak. Sirius looked at me with a raised eyebrow. 

"Um yes. Why are you freaking out." He asked and ran a hand through his hair. 

"I have to meet Ron and Hermione at the Leaky Cauldron at 2." I said and looked around for my glasses. I looked up at Sirius and he was holding them in his hands. I grinned and put them on. 

"Well I'm going to take a shower. I'll see you when you get back." He said and kissed me quickly before walking into the bathroom. When he walked into the bathroom I grabbed the pages I tore out of the book from the Hogwarts Library and ran down to the fireplace. I quickly flooed to the Leaky Cauldron and shot out of it into Draco Malfoy. 

"Hello Potter." He looked down at me. "Still cannot floo like a grown adult?" He questioned and reached his hand down to me. I looked at his hand wide-eyed. 

"Thanks Malfoy." I said and grasped his hand. He smirked at me and walked out the front door. I stared after him then shook my head. I walked up to Tom. 

"Hello Mr. Potter. What can I do for ya?" He asked. 

"Are Hermione or Ron here yet?" 

"Yes both of them, follow me." He said. I nodded and followed him into a private booth in the back. There were seating next to each other so i slide in across from them. 

"Thanks Tom." I said and removed my black cloak. He nodded his head and left. 

"Hello Harry. What did you have to tell me? It seems big." She asked curiously. I grinned at her and folded my hands in front of me. 

"Sirius is alive." I said quietly. All she did was stare at me, then she screamed. Ron put a hand across her mouth to muffle it a tad. 

"How?" She asked, tears in her eyes. I realized that I didn't even know how he got back. 

"I-I don't know." I was going to have to ask him about that one. 

"Harry you said you had something else to tell me." Ron said. I quickly went cold. I was going to have to tell them. 

"This is going to be a little hard to tell you. Well you guys always knew I was...gay." I said slowly. They both nodded their heads."Well it turns out so is Sirius. So when he came back we had a little confrontation and we...well we are like together now. But don't freak out." I said quickly at the end. They both just stared. Nothing was said. "Come on you guys. Don't act like that. I'm happy. I'm really happy." I pleaded with them. Hermione slowly closed her mouth. 

"Are you sure Harry? You could get in a lot of trouble for this." I smiled, of course she was concerned that I would get in trouble. That showed that she accepted this. I turned my gaze towards Ron. His mouth was unmoving. 

"Ron, please, say something." I begged. I saw Hermione punch his leg from under the table. 

"It's great mate, wonderful." He said deadly. 

"There's also one other thing I wanted to tell you guys. This...idea of mine is nothing that I'm going to do anytime soon, I'm still way too young. I was thinking about this maybe after I graduated." I quickly stammered. I grabbed the pieces of paper from my pocket and handed them to Hermione, I knew she would understand. I watched silently as she read the pages, her eyes widening as she read further. Finally she finished. 

"Harry!" She shrieked. I looked at up at her, as a child would when they were punished. 

"Yes?" I asked and looked at her. I huge grin spread across her face. 

"Kids! Oh my gosh that would be so exciting. I totally agree with the after graduation thing, but this is amazing. I always knew how bad you wanted children." I let all of my muscles relax. I looked at Ron and he still had that dead look on his face. I looked at Hermione sadly. 

"Well you guys I've got to go. We should meet up again, real soon." I said enthusiastically. Hermione nodded and pulled me into a bone crushing hug. Then I looked at Ron. He hugged me too. 

"I'm happy for you mate, I really am. Just a bit of a shock, you know." He whispered into my ear. I nodded. My eyes brimmed with tears and I quickly tried to push them away. 

After out goodbyes I flooed back to Sirius. I quietly walked up to our room. He was sprawled out across the bed, sleeping. I grinned at him and walked back downstairs. I took my cloak off and went into the kitchen. I started making some tea. I knew that would relax me. After I had the tea water boiling on the stove I went over to the kitchen table and sat down. I laid my head on my arms, and thought. I couldn't believe they were alright with this. It's not everyday you find out your best friend is with a man that could be his father then you want to have children with him. I was awoken from my thoughts at the cry of the tea kettle. I quickly pulled it off of the stove and poured the tea in a cup. As I set the tea kettle down I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. I grinned lazily and leaned back against the person. 

"Have fun?" He whispered right into my ear sending shivers down my spine. 

"You know it." I replied and turned to kiss him. Sirius fully responded and pushed his lips against mine. 

"What did they say?" He asked. I put two cups of tea on the kitchen table and sat down. Sirius sat down in the spot across from me. 

"They were fine with the idea of us being together." I started off. 

"Then what is making you look so nervous?" He asked, eyeing me. I took in a deep breath and began. 

"You know when you went to Remus's and I said I was sleeping? Well I wasn't. I actually went to Hogwarts to look something up. I really thought about this and decided this is what I want. I hope you want it too. I know it is going to come as a shock to you, but try and think about the positives. I love you Sirius I really do. I hope you love me as much as I love you, and I hope that we stay together forever. So with that...I want to have kids." I finally got out. I looked at Sirius and tried to read his reaction, then he exploded.

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Next Chapter: Find out what Sirius thinks about the child idea. Also find out what is up with Draco. I know a lot of you want to know how Sirius came back. That will be in the chapter after next.

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	4. 4th Chapter

prongsblack, foxx666, resse craven, lizzie24, eric2, Larissa Hahn, idril.tinuviel, miru amai, sirius-gal-4-eva

Thanks for reviewing!

This is a really short chapter and I'm sorry. It's really hard writing two stories at once. That was a stupid move on my part. Anyway Read Review Enjoy.

I stared at him, tears streaming. The things he was saying, and doing. 

"Harry have you gone mad!? I was just brought back from the dead! Now I'm with a boy that could be my son! Then he wants kids! No Harry, no! Don't you think we have enough on our hands as it is?" He shouted at me. He stood up and started paced, still shouting obscene things. I quietly sobbed. 

As he ranted I quietly got up and walked out the door, I couldn't take that. I wanted to have a family with him and all he did was scream and shove it in my face. I ran down the street, the street lights flickering. Now where would I go? I knew I would have to eventually back to Sirius. Speaking of Sirius... 

"Harry! Don't leave. I'm sorry okay?" I spun around, the hurt clearly showing in my eyes. 

"I'm not leaving, at least not permanently. Sirius, I want a family more than anything, and I want to have a family with you. Then way you just reacted clearly showed me what you think about that idea. I'll be back, because we are going to have to talk about this. Just not right now." I finished and continued down the street. I guess I could go to the Leaky Cauldron for a night or two. I would have to walk now...unless. I stuck my right arm out and the Knight Bus came zooming. The purple door was open and Stan came out, pimply as ever. I smiled quickly and walked onto the bus. I didn't feel like talking. 

"Leaky Cauldron." I said on my way back to a sit, after I had paid. I rested my head against the window as the bus lurched into motion. Why did he say those things? I thought he loved me, or at least loved me enough to accept me wishes. I sighed deeply and tried to get some sleep, even though it was quite impossible on this bus. After about a half hour of stopping, jumping forward, and just swerving unnaturally we reached the Leaky Cauldron. I quickly muttered my thanks and walked off of the bus. It was still dark and damp out when I got there. I walked inside and Tom was snoring lightly. 

"Tom?" I whispered quietly not wanting to startle him. "Tom?" I said a bit louder. He sat up straight with bleary eyes then looked at me with a small smile. 

"Hello there Harry. Anything I could do for you?" He asked, concern in his eyes. 

"Just a room for a night or two." I said trying to sound cheerful. He nodded and turned around. 

"Room 14, floor two." He said. I grinned kindly, handed him some money and walked upstairs. I opened my room and it looked like the same room I had stayed in when I found out Sirius was after me. The thought brought back memories and I shook my head trying to forget about it. I realized how tired I was and flopped down on the bed. I didn't know how to handle something like this. I was only 15, well 16 in a few weeks. I really loved Sirius, but would a child separate us? I was just drifting into an uneasy sleep when there was a knock on the door. I grabbed my wand and headed towards the door. I slowly opened it and Draco Malfoy was standing there. 

"Hello Potter." He said and pushed his way into the room. I looked at him shocked. 

"Draco?" I questioned. 

"Yes that is me, forgotten your old school mates already?" He smirked. My jaw dropped, mates? 

"Mates? Draco what are you on? I promise I won't tell." I looked at him. He laughed, it was kind of soothing. No! No! No! I couldn't think like that, I have Sirius. 

"Listen Potter, I need some help. The only person that can help me is you. So lets just put all of our stupid petty arguments behind us. Besides you seem nice enough, even with Granger and the Weasel." He said and was looked at small little trinkets on the bedside table. 

"What do you need help with?" I questioned, one eyebrow raised. He took in a deep breath and turned to look at me. 

"Okay I know you know about my father being in with the Dark Lord and all." I looked at him and nodded. "Well know my father wants me in on it too. To be honest with you Potter, I think it all royally sucks. I'd rather just be like you know the good guy for once. So can you help me?" I looked at him and grinned. 

"You're serious aren't you?" I asked him. He looked at me and slowly nodded. I sighed and walked over to him. I gripped his shoulders and looked him in his eyes. Normally I would have said they were a cold gray, but know they were scared and welcoming at the same time. 

"So you'll help?" He asked. I grinned and nodded. He smiled back, and to my surprise swung his arms around me. He kept saying thank you into my shoulder. I patted his back and knew this was going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship. I slowly pulled away and looked Draco in the eyes. 

"Stay here the night. Then when can figure some things out." I suggested and he nodded. I was lucky there were two twin beds. I really didn't feel like sharing with Draco. He quietly took his cloak off and shoes and crawled into the bed. After I was sure he was fine I walked out of the room quietly. I was going to borrow Tom's owl. 

"Tom? Can I borrow your owl?" I asked him as I walked up to the desk. He nodded sleepily and pointed to his owl. I reached forward and the owl jumped onto my shoulder. I carried her up to my room and set her on the small writing desk. I grabbed a piece of parchment a quill and some ink and sat down. I started scratching on the paper. 

Dear Sirius, 

I'm really sorry I took off like that. I just need to think for a while. I really don't want to talk about it over a letter though. I just don't understand why you reacted like that. I thought maybe you would support the idea. Just please don't panic and send out a search team. I'm with Draco and I was wondering if we could help him out a little bit. He's like on our side now. Well I'm getting tired. Bye. 

Love, 

Harry 

I nodded my head and tied the letter to the gray owl's leg, told it where to go and it flew out the window. I sighed and rubbed my head. It was getting late so I decided to try and get some sleep. I failed miserably. All I did was toss and turn for about an hour. I couldn't sleep knowing what had happened with me and Sirius. I slowly got up, trying no to wake Draco, and got my cloak and shoes on. I wrote a quick note saying where I was and telling him not to leave. I opened the door with a small creak and made my way back to Sirius.

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Next Chapter- Harry talks to Sirius about everything, even how he came back. I'll try and make this chapter longer too.

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